Much Ado About Something
by PixieDust493
Summary: Part of my "Of Crimson Bites and Kisses" series. Renji and Rukia take a family visit, and for a reason Rukia would like kept secret. A little one-shot drabble based against a few lines from Shakespeare's 'Much Ado About Nothing'. Renji x Rukia.


**I don't own Bleach.** **I don't own Much Ado About Nothing.**A really annoying bit of Renji x Rukia drabble that popped into my head. Sorry if it's really confusing, all becomes clear at the end. =)

A one-shot drabble based against a few lines from Shakespeare's play, Much Ado About Nothing. I thought the whole Beatrice/Benedick=Rukia/Renji thing was too good to resist.

[Renji x Rukia, if I gave the setting away, it'd give away the whole thing, Humour and Love Squabble. AU and sometimes a bit ooc, I apologize]

**Much Ado About Something**

**-Of Crimson Bites and Kisses Take Three (series)**

**-**

"_**I wonder that you will still be talking, Signior**__**  
**__**Benedick: nobody marks you."**_

"Without a word of falter, and the entire Gotei 13 would agree with me, Beatrice beats Benedick ANY day!" With a casual flick of her wrist, and a final, definite tone of voice, Rukia threw down her triple seven of hearts and two Jacks. After scanning Renji's face for any sign of smug confidence, she decided she could not be defeated. "Just as I beat you." She punctuated, tunefully.

Renji awaited her all-too-quick triumphant assumption. The exact smug confidence she had decided against slowly crept across Renji's face, in addition to the cocky, upturned line of his mouth. He glanced down at his hand; the cards seemed to speak for themselves. _Owned_. He smirked through his nose and narrowed his dark, piercing eyes at his opponent. "You assume too much, Kuchiki."

The red-head casually dropped his Royal Flush to the centre of the low, ridiculously floral table.

Rukia said nothing, nor was her expression one of shock, more of subtle knowing. She could not place within herself whether she had anticipated this happening or whether she truly thought she had him beat. _Well,_ _the definition of insanity is playing the same game of cards with the same person over and over, and expecting a different result._ She thought with no sound, perhaps a bit too loud, as Renji sensed her thoughts and snapped his eyes up. _Then again, this is a game of chance…yet…he always…_ "CHEAT!" Rukia's shout shot across the table and hit Renji squarely in the face.

"_**What, my dear Lady Disdain! Are you yet living?"**_

"Not So." Renji folded his arms, in defense and sat back. "You merely suck at this game." He chuckled poking his tongue skyward, purposely provoking the righteous Rukia.

Rukia swept all the cards from the table with one swift brush of her arm. "So I may not be as skilled as others in games, but I _am_ skilled in other areas. So, with your being good at _cheating_, obviously means you lack somewhere else…or perhaps you're trying to compensate for something with that insanely big ego of yours." Rukia snickered, pulling a tube of assorted coloured candy from inside her robe and popping the cap off.

Renji fell about laughing, rolling several paces from his ridiculously floral, patterned cushion. "Gee, and I guess you'd be a good judge of what I'm trying to compensate for, Huh? Kuchiki?" Renji dropped his gag and hung his jaw after Rukia started to rattle the tube of candy at him maliciously. "Wha? Rukia? No, it can't be, not the new…the new UberRainbowHappyFunMagicalFizzOnYourTongue Assorted Candy!"

Rukia stuck her tongue towards the gawping red-head, "Mmm Hmm!" She slowly poured a few pieces of the candy onto the table and carefully selected the perfectly shaped sweet. "And YOUR not getting any!"

Renji growled, "No fair! You lost at cards, so you're obliged to give me a piece of candy!" He delved further into her words, "Well, of course I wouldn't be 'getting any'," He sniggered playfully, "At least not while we're here, it wouldn't be appropriate."

"Always so full of yourself Renji, what makes you think I'd ever anyway? Egoistic swine!" Rukia vented at him before grabbing a fistful of Candy and tossing each piece, expertly, into her mouth.

"_**It is so, indeed; he is no less than a stuffed man:**__**  
**__**but for the stuffing,--well, we are all mortal."**_

After stiffening like a robot, and pretending to be shocked, with Shinigami reflexes, Renji swiped a crimson coloured piece of candy from before Rukia. "Egoistic swine maybe, but that doesn't improve your awareness does it? Hah!" He bit into the candy noisily and scratched his headband idly. Rukia did not flinch.

"I let you have that." She defended. "I felt bad for calling you an 'egoistic swine'." Rukia's mischievous smile held still.

Renji choked comically on his candy, "Remorse? Really?" Wide-eyed in amazement, he thought maybe she was warming to him. _Maybe, she just might let me do what I came here to do._

"_**Then is courtesy a turncoat."**_

"No!" Rukia bust into fits of giggles, _He should know me better by now._ She smiled warmly to herself.

Renji scoffed, "Of course! The Righteous Rukia! Always to pass the judgement of 'swine' to poor peasant Renji!" He touched her arm to tell her he was only joking.

Rukia swatted his arm away, "Hey! Pervert! What are you trying to touch me for?" She flashed her earnest eyes at him once, and he knew she was kidding. "So what was it you came here to do anyway?" Rukia pretended to skillfully sort through her candy whilst she let Renji ponder the thought.

Renji's parted slightly, like a goldfish. "How did you hear that?! I was concentrating so hard on thinking quietly!" He 'hmphed' and turned away like a child.

"So my awareness may be lacking, but you can't quiet your mind, loudmouth." Rukia taunted, turning his turned head towards her.

Renji took her hands from his face, "Loudmouth huh? Well, if you must know, I came here to…," Renji turned his eyes skyward, pretending to think, "…STEAL YOUR CANDY!" He roared and proceeded to tickle the petite Shinigami mercilessly.

Rukia clutched the candy tube to her chest, but that didn't stop Renji tickling all the laughter out of her. "Renji! Stop, Stop it!" Rukia squealed and then when it hurt to laugh, she bopped Renji on the nose "Hey! Tattoo face, Stop!"

The tribal-marked Shinigami stopped abruptly and smoothed over his facial markings. "These things?" His face took a solemn expression, "They bother you?" He asked Rukia, who was staring straight past him. "Kuchiki?" He prodded her shoulder, irritatingly.

Rukia flicked her head sharply towards Renji. "Don't disturb my zoning out baka!" She blinked furiously and playfully slapped Renji's headband from his head. Renji chuckled and stuffed the band in his pocket. "Gee, I must be tired, your fault for tickling me." Rukia slurred in Renji's general direction.

Renji hummed and lay back against the foot of the settee, folding his arms leisurely behind his head. _Gee at this rate we'll never be able to tell her._

"Tell who?" Rukia piped, sleepily. She shuffled over to Renji and clumsily collapsed into his lap, trying to make it look like a complete accident.

Renji snorted, "Damn it, Kuchiki! How come you can still hear my thoughts? I'm being EXTRA quiet on the reitsu front. And…HEY! WHAT'S WITH THE HEAD IN THE LAP?!" Renji tried to scoot her off but Rukia wrung her fists into his hakama pants, holding on tight.

"I'M COMFORTABLE, DAMN IT!" Rukia shot at Renji, making loud snoring noises purposefully to irritate him.

Pulling a facial of pure dumbfoundness, Renji ignored the 'sleeping' Rukia, and returned to linking his hands under his ponytail. _I wish I didn't always have to put up a front, I wish I could just…be normal, and tell her how I really feel. But, we're just two hot-heads, we'll never be normal. Not that it's a bad thing, I mean…ahh…every day's exciting…but if I could just…_ Renji brushed the single dark, glistening bang from the centre of Rukia's forehead, revealing more of her unfurrowed, ivory skin. _Perfect_. Then, holding the sleeping Shinigami's shoulders, he gingerly leaned over her, and touched a tender kiss to her brow.

At first, Rukia didn't react too violently, she merely stirred, wiping at the place where Renji had kissed her. Then, the cogs of her brain began to tick into motion, as she realized what had just happened…

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT, ABARAI?!" Rukia screamed, leaping from where she lay straight into a combat stance before Renji.

The red-head's onyx eyes sought forgiveness. Though, Renji's subconscious would not let go the feeling that he shouldn't have to seek it. _We are…kind of…well…involved?_

The sound of a door sliding shut, "I'm home!" An old, but cheerful voice sang.

"Obasaan!" Renji sprung to his feet and dusted himself off, adjusting his black robe and white sash. "I didn't think you'd be back for another couple of hours, when did your train arrive?" He took the elderly woman's hand as she approached the living room door.

Rukia composed herself and stood in the very corner of the room, she never taken to welcoming people back, when it was their house in the first place. Very strange.

The cheerful , wrinkled lady sat graceful and delicately on the sofa, "Well!" she exclaimed, exasperated, "You cannot imagine the trouble with the train…" she trailed into a lengthy description of her journey from her brother's abode, returning to her own home.

Sidling carefully up to Renji, who appeared intently listening to his droning grandmother (but she knew better), Rukia whispered, "Why are we at your grandmother's again?"

Renji slid his arm around Rukia's waist, he felt her aversion to it, and her even trying to push him away, but her held her firmly. Then he replied, without opening his mouth, _I'm about to show you._

"Obasaan! I'm so sorry to interrupt, but I don't think I can wait any longer," Renji said, quite plainly.

Rukia twigged the thought train, _No! NO! RENJI DON'T DO IT! You know how much I hate people knowing we're…_

Renji turned to Rukia, and sustained a cheeky wink, before drawing in all the breath he could, just to annoy the girl at his arm, "We're engaged!" he boomed. He could just _feel_ the anger radiating from Rukia.

"Oh wonderful, Dumplings!" Renji's grandmother stood and clapped her hands together. She hugged both the cockily smirking Shinigami and the grimacing little fireball wrapped in his arm. "Just wonderful!" she exclaimed again. "Now, of course…" The sunny old dear launched into another droning monologue of 'engagement for dummies'.

_Hah! I'm going to marry you, Kuchiki Rukia...I know you can hear me…_ Renji still wore his cocky smirk and placed a fierce kiss to Rukia's head.

Rukia glared back her fiancée, she couldn't believe he'd told another, after she'd only agreed to marry him on the grounds that he WOULDN'T tell anyone…_I'm going to KILL you Abarai Renji!_

**Post Script**

_So tell me if you liked it, tell me if you hated it. Again so many thanks to reviewers. Means the world._

_Love PixieDust x_


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